M is for Morning: The A to Z Blogging Challenge Unsanctioned Imitation

Oh, Morning, why do you torment me so? How have I offended you to deserve the symphony of barking dogs, chattering squirrels and shrieking birds delivered to me in stereo with the volume set to 11? What social snub have I offered that would require a bathroom tile floor so cold that penguins roosting on it would migrate to warmer climates? What horrible insult have I hurled at you for my bathroom light switch to be connected to the sun?

Please, Morning, accept my apology for every injury I may have caused you previously and in the future. We can start over, try again to be friends. If I behave, maybe the next time I get up early to exercise with you, the kids will not wake up five minutes into my workout and refuse to go back to sleep. If I call myself a “Morning Person,” perhaps the next time I arise to see the sunrise and enjoy a cup of coffee with you, my mother’s radar won’t pick up on the fact that I’m awake and call me to discuss what my children want for Christmas for the hundredth time.

Oh, Morning, who am I kidding? We can never be friends – not when my bed is so cozy and warm. Not when Evening and I are out late having a cocktail together or reducing the recently reanimated dead to tiny bloody bits of rotting flesh on the Wii. Or both. I’m sorry we have to have such an adversarial relationship, Morning. I really am. Now will you please tell those freaking dogs to shut up so I can go back to bed?

14 thoughts on “M is for Morning: The A to Z Blogging Challenge Unsanctioned Imitation

  1. lbwoodgate says:

    Stiff upper lip Tawn. It all changes when you become an “empty nester”. You’ll start crawling into bed by 9pm and bright-eyed at 5am. Something to look forward to, eh?

  2. James Garcia Jr says:

    *laughs* That was awesome! I get up at 3 am during the work week, as I have mentioned before. I’m used to it now, of course, having been doing it for a decade now. It doesn’t mean I like it. I used to say that I don’t like getting up earlier than God does – it’s much too risky.
    😉

    -Jimmy

    • TotallyTawn says:

      I used to work from about 6 pm until 6 am, come home, curl up in a patch of sunlight like a cat and snooze all day. It was heaven! Except when someone would wake me at noon. They always figured I was some sort of unemployed loser who has nothing better to do than sleep all day long when I finally drag my butt out of bed to answer the door. LOL!

  3. Snoring Dog Studio says:

    Wonderful post! You don’t need to be friends with Morning – I would suggest mutual civility and respect for the fact that some people aren’t morning people. My relationship with Evening is quite strained, however. I harbor a lot of resentment over having to come inside after a nice day in the garden!

  4. sarahbutland says:

    You deal with this too? And in such a poetic fashion that mornings typically don’t deserve.

    Although we control our own destiny and thought process, I am finding that harder and harder to do as I work until 2 AM. When my son wakes for breakfast at 8 AM I realize I am no longer a morning person at all, only my internal clock forgot to tell me that I’m now a night person…. so mid afternoon napping person?

    Thanks for doing this clever challenge.

    • TotallyTawn says:

      Thank you for sharing. I have never been a morning person. When I was a teenager, my parents would have to get up at the butt crack of dawn to go to work. To help them wake up, they would turn on all the lights in the house and blast the radio. They seemed to find it vastly amusing when I would stumble out of my room wearing sunglasses, turn off the lights and the radio, and yell at them to go to work already!

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